I have heard this so many times. “Natural hair is all good but not for me. I just would not be able to maintain it.” But is it really that difficult to maintain? When I went natural, maintaining my hair was not one of my problems for real. Why, because my mind was not focused on making it look like relaxed hair. It is natural hair and it grows in a coily and sometimes zigzag manner. And that’s okay.
I remember, one of my friends passing a comment at my hair a few month into my natural hair journey. She said, “But your hair is not straight.” And I said, “Because I’m a black African woman and that is actually how it grows from my scalp. It’s part of the package of being a black African. You get to have this amazing hair.”
I feel as if most of our struggles in growing natural hair start are in our minds. Or rather, not being able to transition our minds as we transition our hair from chemically treated hair to natural hair. What do I mean? Here is the thing. Expecting your natural hair to act and look the same as your relaxed hair is not just unrealistic but frustrating to you and your hair.
We have been so conditioned to think that straight hair is beautiful, or bigger curls are better. That is as false as it can get. Coily hair is beautiful and a very tight curl is better in so many ways. For example, a twist is always full and fluffy compared to curlier hair types. Unless one has volume naturally. And if you were to lock your hair, a tighter curl will lock easily compared to a looser curl. Which can also be a foe. If not detangled for too long, a tighter curl will take more time to detangle.
So, when we transition to natural hair, our minds need to transition as well and embrace what natural hair is completely. It will not be straight, you will have to do that manually. It may not be soft, you will need to apply product to make it soft. And the list goes on. Gather the knowledge that you need to maintain your natural hair and you will not struggle one bit.
Let’s take combing hair for example. A lot of people com[plain about natural hair being difficult to comb. Why comb it? Okay, maybe the look you are going for requires you to comb you hair. Fine. Then you need to wet your hair first before you use any comb. And not just any comb, but a wide toothed comb. If combs are too much for you, use your fingers to groom your hair. Or a detangling brush. See, there is so much that can be done in that regard.
And another common issue with natural hair is not knowing what to do with it. The beautiful thing about natural hair actually, is the many options we are spoiled with when it comes to stuff to do with it. As in hairstyles. This includes just letting it be. Yes, you read right. That is a hairstyle in itself. If you need your hair to be straight, blow drying and using the straightener is an option. When done correctly with good products, your hair should revert back to it’s glorious coily curly self when in contact with water.
Styling natural hair is so amazing because natural hair doesn’t only have body and volume but texture as well. It can be better shaped and sculpted into beautiful artifacts and if you are gifted in creativity, the sky is the limit really.
You struggle because you don’t know. If someone taught you how, then you would not struggle at all. That is why I am here, to help you along your natural hair journey. Sharing the knowledge that I have gained over the years so that, where I struggled, you don’t have to.
Are you struggling with your natural hair? What do you want to know that will make your journey much easier and enjoyable?
2 comments
It was so much easier to detangle my hair and do knots when it was shorter. I love the fullness of it but now its so much more difficult to do it, but like you say, I think I just have the wrong mental approach and need to adjust my thinking and embrace my hair in all its fullness
Indeed. And thank you for sharing your experience.
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